It's official. Today, after weeks of sexual harassment and infidelity claims against him, Herman Cain put his presidential campaign on suspension.  

I must admit I'll miss the guy. Not because he's been a great candidate or anything like that - just because it was so much fun to make fun of him.  He knew nothing of foreign relations, and his economic proposals would have benefited no one but he himself. 

I'm also upset that his departure means that this is the last time I can post this video:

Over the last few weeks, Cain slipped from the top spot in polls of South Carolina Republicans to a distant third. 

In early November, he had 33 percent, leading closest competitor Mitt Romney by 10. But a poll conducted four weeks later found him third with only 13 percent.  

Meanwhile, Newt Gingrich rose to first place in South Carolina polls, and now has 38 percent. 

While Gingrich's increase could come from Cain supporters who switched after the scandals were brought to the public eye, part of that growth could have derived from previously undecided voters, though.

In a November 1 poll by Rasmussen, 30 percent of Republicans in the state were undecided; for the November 28 Insider Advantage poll, though, only 18 percent had yet to declare a favored candidate.

In my opinion, should Cain remain officially on hiatus, his remaining 13 percent will be split between Gingrich and Texas Gov. Rick Perry, as should the 18 percent still undecided. Perry should have a better take from this total of 31 percent, though. It won't give him enough to overtake Gingrich, but Perry will still do better than Romney, I'll wager. 

Of course, who knows what else will come out over the next seven weeks or so?

Further demonstrating the idiocy in their (fraudulent) "small government" claims, last night's debate made it clear the Republican Party candidates are making it all up as they go along.

Take Rick Perry's spiel, for example. Included in his platform, he said, are goals to eliminate three federal agencies. But in his attempt to expound that premise, he could only name two.

And when media conducting the event asked him for details, he flat out admitted that he couldn't remember the third agency.

Here - watch it yourself:

So what does this example indicate? That the GOP candidates are trying to reel in a very big fish from very shallow waters, and without using any bait, either. (Hell, Perry didn't even bring a fishing pole....)

Their platforms are unprepared. They're unprepared for debates. They don't know the topics that are important to American voters. And not one of them has any chance of winning the 2012 election, either.


See more Rick Perry funanigans!
Confederates for Perry upstage campaign announcement
Perry 'an idiot,' says GOP insider
Rick Perry: read his lips!

Gov. Rick Perry, a Republican presidential candidate whose popularity took a recent plunge in the polls, is spending today in South Carolina in hopes of rebuilding support.

And for everyone who can't fit the Texas governor in their schedule, the South Carolina Democratic Party offers this video which tells you, more or less, not to bother. 

"Governor Perry's visit to South Carolina showcases the latest in the parade of Republican losers to visit our state. While his positions have been more consistent than Mitt the Flip, he has been consistently wrong," says Dick Harpootlian, SCDP chair. 

"While President Obama has been focused on bringing our troops home from Iraq and making the country safe from terrorism by eliminating Osama bin Laden and Moammar Gaddafi, Rick Perry has been trotting out all the worn out and discredited economic policies of George W. Bush and wandering around the stage of the GOP debates like a punch drunk fighter.  South Carolina needs a visit from Rick Perry like it needs another term of Mark Sanford or Nikki Haley. We have had enough." 

And just about everyone else in the state has had enough of Perry, too. In a recent poll of Republican voters in the state, he came in a distant third with only 15 percent. He took only two percent in an Oct. 15th Tea Party straw poll, conducted in Columbia. 

Tonight's Republican presidential candidate was ... entertaining, let's say. 

And not solely due to the multiple jabs tossed at Herman Cain, who's made a recent rise in the polls, either. 

What was most entertaining was the hissy fits displayed between Mitt Romney and Rick Perry, who "swapped criticism in unusually personal terms" throughout the event (and which is the subject of this post). 

While I could go on an on about their trade in juvenile tirades, I thought I'd let you fill in the blanks. 

Tell us, folks. Give us a caption for the verbal interchange you see below. Just type your personal observation on their personal conversation in the "comments" section below, and a to-be-determined "winner" will win a wonderful meal created by my wonderful wife!

DISCLAIMER: no limit on number of entries - entries should not include any blatant vulgarities - a winner will be determined on my personal preferences alone (so tough!) - the winner's meal will be determined solely by my wife - Robservations can not be held responsible for any illness or flatulence derived from the meal prepared by my garlic-loving, Sicilian spouse.

Don't wait! Post your entries NOW!

Normally, I can't stand to listen to Republican politicians, and because half of what they say is completely false (and the other half is just distorted truth). Still, I'll break down occasionally to listen to some of them just to catch the humorous gaffes they commonly make. 

But Rick Perry isn't one of those candidates. He says unbelievably stupid things (like, the government should have our schools should teach intelligent design), only to issue other stupid statements that defeat his first (like his later statement that the government should have nothing to do with schools). They're both horribly wrong and stabbingly insulting -  but they're hypocritical, too, since both of those conflicting statements come from the same mouth. 

And even though he sometimes tells the absolute truth, the fact he apparently intended to send a different message (like "George W. Bush did an incredible job in the presidency, defending us from freedom") makes such gaffes flat-out shocking instead of humorous. 

But I just found one take on Perry that makes his brand of verbalism hysterical. Instead of listening to his words, just read his lips and apply the words that he appears to mouth. And even funnier, you'll find he makes much more sense in this method than if you heard his actual words. The video's below. Check out the text crawl, and keep a close eye on Perry's mouth. The ... well, accuracy is quite impressive!

(created/posted on youtube by BadLipReading)

And just for comparison, here is Perry's original with the actual audio:  

(posted on youtube by RickPerryPresident)

And if you bothered to watch the second one, don't you agree that the satirical first video makes Perry sound so much better than he really is?  

Bruce Bartlett, former Treasury adviser under George W. Bush, made his opinion of another GOP presidential candidate quite clear this morning.

"Rick Perry is an idiot," Bartlett said on CNN's American Morning, "and I don't think anyone would disagree with that."

Earlier this week, Perry said Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke's plans to stimulate the economy through money circulation would be "treasonous." 

But spending money (an "expansionary fiscal policy," Bartlett said) is key to correcting current economic problems. And since other methods, such as expansion in government employment and new public works projects, are being delayed and blocked by Republicans in congress, there's no other strategic avenue.

"We have to look to the one institution that still has freedom of action, which is the Federal Reserve. The risks of doing too little are far greater than the risks of doing too much."

Despite serving the Treasury under Pres. Bush and having also been adviser to Pres. Reagan, Bartlett is known to take a non-partisan approach in his criticisms. The current economic woes, for example, are the fault of the previous Republican president, Bartlett has repeatedly stated. 

***
Read about Perry's campaign announcement from right here in Charleston:
'Confederates for Perry' upstage campaign announcement

Rick Perry made it official this afternoon, but only after a small group of demonstrators performed a tongue-in-cheek rally for the latest Republican presidential candidate.

The Texas governor formally announced his campaign from the Francis Marion Hotel in downtown Charleston at 1:30 p.m. Beginning at noon, though, three locals in antebellum garb worked the crowd across the street.

“As governor, he’s already threatened to secede Texas from the union,” was a common address they offered to the hundreds attending the weekly Farmer’s Market in Marion Square.

“And if he’s elected president, Perry can secede the whole dang country!”

Working as Bonnie, Clyde and Rutledge Beauregard, the trio engaged with the crowd for about an hour, presenting themselves as confederates reborn after learning of Perry’s bid for the White House.

“We’ve waited 150 years for Rick Perry. We haven’t had a candidate this good since Jefferson Davis!

“And what better place to announce his campaign than right here in South Carolina? We were the first state to secede back in 1861, after all.”

(video above from SC Forward Progress)

Following a Tea Party event in 2009, Perry told media that Texas could secede from the United States due to Pres. Obama’s stimulus package.

The Recovery Act brought $787 billion into the national economy with goal of rebuilding from recession.

“We’ve got a great union,” Perry said while criticizing the program. “But Texas is a very unique place,” he said in reiteration of the secession idea, “and we’re a pretty independent lot to boot.”

The confederate three stuck that line to Perry today, bearing “secede now!” signs. 

The demonstration (billed “Confederates for Perry”) was organized by SC Forward Progress, an activist group formed earlier this year. The organization’s declared goal is to draw public intention to the right-wing influence on politics in the both the state and the nation.

“For some reason, the three who were born in the 1800’s haven’t aged since the end of the Civil War,” said Lachlan McIntosh, director of SC Forward Progress, about the demonstrators. “They are excited about Perry’s talk of seceding from the union and his repeated call for states’ rights.”

McIntosh handled press that approached the group, which included both local and national media.  ABC News quickly ran the story on its website.

In today’s formal announcement, Perry was quick in attempt to overcome his 2009 secession statements.

“I know I’ve talked a lot about Texas,” he said. “I’m a Texan, and I’m proud of it. But first and foremost, I am an incredibly proud American.”

After the demonstration, Bonnie, Clyde and Rutledge quickly returned to their confederate roots in the city where the Civil War began.

Their message is still alive, though, and was even featured in media from Perry's home state. 

(from the Texas Tribune)